Parental stress and autism: how do you deal with the mental pressure?

Parents of autistic children may find it difficult to handle the mental pressure that can sometimes be overwhelming. Here’s how to deal with it.

A woman strangled her three-and-a-half-year-old daughter in a fit of rage in an Indian city. The reason? The little girl was severely autistic, and the mother herself suffered from depression that stemmed from raising two autistic daughters on her own. While this may be an extreme case, you can’t ignore the fact that parents of children with autism face other mental health challenges in their daily lives. More emphasis is placed on caring for the child to ensure healthy development. And inevitably, this can affect the caregiver’s mental health in the long run. Know how having an autistic child can affect your mental health and what you can do to manage the effects.

What is autism?

Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) or autism is a group of neurodevelopmental disorders that are “characterized by some degree of difficulty with social interaction and communication,” according to the World Health Organisation. It generally becomes apparent during early childhood. Many factors can cause autism, including genetics, low birth weight, metabolic imbalances, viral infections, being born to older patients, toxins and certain medications.

Also read: Look for these signs to know if your child has autism

woman with a child with autism
Autism is a neurodevelopmental disorder that generally affects children. Image courtesy: Adobe Stock

Parental stress and autism: how does it affect a parent’s mental health?

Parents of children with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) appear to be at higher risk for stress, anxiety and depression, according to a 2022 study published in the journal Global mental health. Having an autistic child can affect parents in a number of ways. Parents may feel stressed, overwhelmed, anxious, frustrated, fearful, and guilty about not being able to meet the demands of their child. Here’s how having a child with autism affects parents mentally:

1. Feeling stressed

“Parents of autistic children often feel stressed about the future of their autistic child, wondering whether they will be accepted by others or live independently. The fear that your child will be bullied or rejected by classmates, family members and relatives. Creating a balance between work and parenting while ensuring that they spend more time with their child can be stressful and take a toll on the child’s mental health,” says psychiatrist Dr Sonal Anand from Wockhardt Hospitals.

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Having an autistic child can impact the entire family, especially the parents, as they must manage and understand their child’s unique needs, which leads to extreme stress. Stress can wreak havoc on their daily lives. A study published in the journal Mental health problems found that parents of children with ASD experienced more stress than parents who did not.

Also read: This is how you deal with autism spectrum disorder

2. Inability to understand the changing behavior

Dr. Anand says that you need to be alert and notice your child and his or her behavior to spot any abnormalities or discomfort and prevent health complications. This can create feelings of frustration for both the child and the parents, which in turn also adds to the stress.

3. Getting overwhelmed

Additionally, parents may be juggling multiple responsibilities, such as getting to doctor’s appointments on time, taking certain medications, managing multiple therapies, and trying to maintain a stable routine at home. This can leave parents feeling like they have too much to handle, which can lead to overwhelm.

4. Lack of communication

Communication becomes the biggest disadvantage when it comes to raising a child with autism. The autistic child may have difficulty expressing his daily needs, wishes or feelings. This can lead to feelings of frustration, anxiety and agitation in both the child and the parents. Not understanding why your child is upset or what he needs can be distressing and often cause him to question his parenting. As a parent, you lose connection with the outside world and start avoiding social gatherings or events in order to devote enough time to your child.

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Tips for parents to deal with mental pressure

Although parenting stress and autism are common, it is important to know how to deal with them to avoid problems and safeguard your relationship with your child, as suggested by the expert.

1. Accept support

When your friends and family offer help, accept it immediately without thinking too much about it. Take support from friends and family to avoid complications. These helping hands can ease your daily responsibilities and reduce chronic stress.

2. Hire help

Managing an autistic child and household chores can become overwhelming, leading to exhaustion. Consider hiring a housekeeper or caregiver to give yourself a much-needed break, the expert says.

3. Stress-relieving techniques

It’s normal to feel stressed when you’re a parent of an autistic child, but certain things can help you relax. Practice stress-relieving techniques such as deep breathing exercises, meditation and yoga to manage stress and stay calm, especially after a difficult situation.

4. Channel your emotions in the right direction

Enjoy your time with your child to the fullest. Instead of dwelling on the shortcomings, focus more on your child’s daily progress and celebrate it, no matter how small it is. This can help strengthen your bond and create a supportive environment for the child.

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Communicating with an autistic child can be difficult, but it is important. Image courtesy: Adobe Stock

5. Consult an expert

It’s normal to feel stressed and sometimes you need help to deal with these problems. It can happen to the best of people! Autism is one of those cases where it is necessary to find someone who can help you. Talking to a professional will help you share your emotions and feelings with someone, which will help you deal with sadness and agitation.